Thursday, June 17, 2010

I hate life.

I'm sick of living in a family where I'm hated. I cry everyday. This is too much for me to handle.
I have a fear of getting yelled at. I get yelled and screamed at everyday for the stupidest shit. When I get yelled at I cry. My dad hates me. He hates my very existence. I'm not appreciated in this house. I'm not loved by my own family. They birthed me but they don't want me now.

I'm not a bad kid.
I'm almost 15. I don't do drugs. I'm not out smoking crap. I don't drink. I listen mostly. I'm still in school. I don't cut myself. I don't have sex. I'm not pregnant. I don't even cuss.
I'm not a bad kid, yet I'm hated.

I swear sometimes I just wanna stab a knife through my heart and get it over with.

Sometimes I think your the only one who loves me. You understand me. You wipe away my tears and you make me laugh when I'm crying. You always cheer me up. You know everything that I like and everything that I hate. You know what makes me angry and you know what turns me on. We never fight, nor argue. You know basically everything about me and you accept me exactly how I am. You even say I'm perfect.

That's not like how my family is. My dad calls me fat, and my mom calls me ugly. My dad keeps saying how I need to cut my hair and I need to go back on the diet. They keep wanting to change me. They hate my idea of not going to college and my dad keeps telling me I'm going whether I want to or not. They just don't accept me.

You do.
Thank you for always being there. Thank you for always cheering me up. Thank you for accepting how I am. Thank you for staying by my side. Thank you for loving me and always being my sweetheart. I love you so much with all my heart and all my soul and everything I am. You make me wish I was a better person. I wish I wouldn't cry so much. I wish I wouldn't put all my sadness on your shoulders. I don't want to be a burden to you. But I promise I'll never hurt you. I'm yours forever as long as you want me forever. You keep me sane. You keep my sanity down. You're the one person making me smile, making me want to continue living. You keep me away from suicidal thoughts.Thank you.

Kevin Anthony Dehner II.
Je t'aime.
Tsi ge yu i.
Ngo oiy ney a.
Ik hou van jou.
Jeg Elsker Dig.
Mina rakastan sinua.
Mahal kita.
Ich liebe dich.
Aloha Au Ia`oe.
Ohevet ot'cha.
Hum Tumhe Pyar Karte hae.
Taim i' ngra leat.
Saya cinta padamu.
Taim i' ngra leat.
Ti amo.
Nanun tangshinul sarang hamnida.
Jeg elsker deg.
Iay ovlay ouyay.
Kocham Ciebie.
Eu te amo.
Te iubesc.
Ya tebya liubliu.
Te amo.
Jag alskar dig.
Seni Seviyorum.
Em ye^u anh.
I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!

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